Day in the life

October 9th, 2009 | By Ethan Drutchas '12 | Section: Features

7:00 a.m. – Wake up, address inevitable existential crises (why am I here?). Stare blankly at ceiling for awhile.
7:07 a.m. – Begin shower, apply shampoo, conditioner and soap.
7:13 a.m. – Leave shower and commence shaving…nothing like a clean shave to shed those feelings of inadequacy.
7:20 a.m. – Return to room and commence dressing…despite a liberal arts education…this is where things get tough.
7:22 a.m. – Decide on unifying color (usually meaning black, brown or blue)…this has profound implications for the rest of the morning.
7:30 a.m. – After deciding on basic concept for outfit, next comes the shirt (if ever in doubt go white). This is then followed by bottoms (you can never go wrong with dark jeans or Chinos). Next comes the tie. In any circumstance I advocate the four hand knot (please, gents—unless you’re wearing a power suit and you sport a Trump mullet the Windsor knots are not for you). If a bow tie is involved this requires a trip back to the bathroom for the benefit of a mirror (these can be tricky little bastards if not watched carefully). Then the most important decision—V-neck or Cardigan (I hate crew necks) which will depend heavily on the day. Then comes the blazer, and with it the important decision of which fold for the pocket square (Bankers square, Three Prong or Flourish—I personally prefer the Flourish). Finally comes the shoes. If in black go black, if in brown go brown, if in blue…do what feels right (naturally, appropriate socks with each).
7:40 a.m. – Grab necessary books and readings from that pile of papers that’s supposed to be my desk, stop and look in mirror and give Don Draper stare (hey, you sexy thing, don’t you ever die) and we’re off to JRC for morning caffeine fix.
7:50 a.m. – Mad dash to class while desperately trying to decipher those illegible little isms I wrote in the margins the night before.
8:00-9:50 a.m. – First two classes. I know I’m a Grinnellian when these, along with my 11 o’clock, constitute the highlight of my day.
10:00 a.m. – Break between classes. Head to library with firm intention of getting ahead on reading.
10:05 a.m. – Nap on comfy library beanbag…yeah.
10:50 a.m. – Desperately attempt to wake myself up and make another mad dash to class.
12:00 p.m.- Lunch in JRC…if that’s what you want to call it.
12:30 p.m. – Head back to Cowles, once in dorm remove shoes and hang blazer, lay in bed with full intention to get to work within half hour.
2:15 p.m. – Mad dash to swim practice.
2:30-5:30 p.m. – Swim practice. (Swimming is a great metaphor for life—it’s really just acclimating oneself to suffering.)
6:00 p.m. – After shower, head to dining hall for dinner and ingest disgusting numbers of calories.
6:30 p.m.—1:00 a.m. – Reading, reading and more reading…punctuated with tea drinking and aimless wandering around campus. (If it’s a Thursday I of course stop by to see Grinnell’s finest DJs, Marcus and Alec, at their radio show.)
1:30 a.m. – Back to dorm to begin nightly grooming.
1:45 a.m. – In bed (on a good night).